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Wednesday June 7, 2006 // By Sarah

Some thought on registering

Registering in your 30s is all about the upgrade. At this age, we’ve already got dishes, silverware, glasses, hand towels, whisks, turkey basters, and serving platters. So preparing for registry shopping is less “Wow! Cake pans!” and more “Wow! Cake pans that don’t leave silvery scraps of non-stick coating on the bottom of the brownies!” Less “Wow! Duvet covers!” and more “Wow! Duvet covers that don’t have a poorly patched rip and strange discolored spots!”

Registering is a very strange form of delayed gratification. I had a lot of trouble not just buying the things I wanted. Why wait until September to buy a summer blanket or camping supplies? Why wait until September to replace the coffee pot that broke a year ago? Because that’s how it works. Once you reach the point of no return, perhaps six months out from your wedding, you are essentially no longer allowed to improve your home. For six months, you must simply watch your belongings continuing to deteriorate. (Note: ignore the voice in your head encouraging you to just go ahead and ruin stuff. You are still not allowed to use metal utensils on the non-stick pots. Seriously. Back away from the pot.)

Even if you let him hold the scanning gun, you still have to ask him what he wants. Stupid mature fiances and their stupid habit of having an opinion about home items.

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