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Friday September 22, 2006 // By Sarah

Sarah Weisz

This morning, I went to the Cook County office and picked up a marriage certificate and then off to the Secretary of State’s office for a new driver’s license. That’s right. I changed my name. I am now, at least to the State of Illinois, officially Sarah Lieberman Weisz.

Stupid feminism, though. I did not, before I went there, spend hours and hours dreamily doodling “Mrs. Sandy Weisz,” and “Sarah Weisz” on all my notebooks. This left me glaringly unprepared at the final moment of the whole process, when the man pointed at the plastic signature pad and asked for my new signature.

And this is why my drivers’ license signature now clearly reads “Sarah Wesz.” Actually, “Saaaaah We sZ.” This is not technically worse than my old signature, if we’re going to be totally honest about it.

I really hate, hate, hate cold calling people, but my job requires lots of these kinds of calls—not always, just right now. At exactly the wrong time. I have been leaving messages like, “Hi, my name is Sarah Lieberman….Weisz. Sarah Lieberman Weisz. Sarah Weisz.” Occasionally I catch myself actually explaining to a stranger’s voicemail that I just got married, and I changed my name, and Lieberman was my old name, but Weisz is my new name, and blah blah blah I am apparently insane, would you like to hear about my program?