On my way to yoga on Wednesday, I ran into Ward, the awesome old guy in our neighborhood. Ward is in his mid-to-late-70s, has a teenage daughter, and walks their black lab Lady every day, despite suffering a stroke last year. I’ve also seen him talking on a bluetooth headphone while he strolls the neighborhood. When you say, “Hey, how are you doing?” he says stuff like, “If I was any better, they’d arrest me!”
Ward (pointing to the belly): Soon, huh?
Me: Any day now!
Ward: [long pause] No. It’ll be about a week and a half. [another long pause] So, is it a boy or a girl?
Me: A boy.
Ward: [long pause] 8 pounds, 3 ounces.